Today was my first official weigh in and I was excited because I had been exercising, using the Wii Fit and moving my body by doing squats. The person in front of me lost 4.6 pounds and a sudden wave of anxiety came over me.
Crap.
That's quite a bit.
I thought I had lost.. oh, two pounds.
I stepped on the scale and the leader's quiet voice spoke.. actually you've gained weight.
WTF!?
Its ok, I've got my big girl pants on today and I am not going to cry!
I was pissed off and it was a hard pill to swallow when EVERY single person in the room lost weight except me! Our team lost more weight then the other team this week. All of us were awarded prizes and I felt silly receiving mine.
I had to clap and smile when everyone did their whoo whoo's, high fives and I wanted to hang my head in shame. I felt I let everyone down and was continually asked, "How did you do!??
People were shocked because they commented I had been exercising and eating well. I then heard comments like, "Maybe you're exercising too hard and are getting muscular!" or "Maybe you should stop exercising"
At the end of the meeting it was time for the Bravos and Five Pound stickers. This is the time you talk about your week, etc.
My mouth opened, "I want to share with everyone that I am the only person who didn't lose weight. I have started exercising regularly and stayed on plan with my points. I'm disappointed but I am not going to give up"
Bravo. I received a Bravo sticker.
I gained .4 pounds.
Sometimes when something happens you begin to ask yourself things like.. what did I do? and you start to replay things in your mind. I wish I had a do over right now.
I've pinned some of the things I will change this week and I will not stop exercising.
In fact, I'm off to the gym tomorrow.
